okay pat passed out under dana's car
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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