Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?

  (469): View more from Texas

  Ya, why?

  (972): View more from Texas

  We should try that some time.

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  (972): Remember that sex scene from American Psycho? (469): Ya, why? (972): We should try that some time. http://tfl.nu/72x3
  Replies (10) Good night (1312) Bad night (755)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.

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  (914): dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk. http://tfl.nu/x11o
  Replies (3) Good night (899) Bad night (2129)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty

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  (609): i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty http://tfl.nu/sjep
  Replies (6) Good night (2821) Bad night (707)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.

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  (970): Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier. http://tfl.nu/o9ed
  Replies (19) Good night (9406) Bad night (1575)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.

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  (949): Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language. http://tfl.nu/y11c
  Replies (23) Good night (4662) Bad night (1003)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.

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  (402): I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange. http://tfl.nu/kq15
  Replies (3) Good night (3442) Bad night (1317)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO

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  (701): ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO http://tfl.nu/t2mi
  Replies (8) Good night (1869) Bad night (1315)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.

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  (706): we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk. http://tfl.nu/l985
  Replies (5) Good night (3182) Bad night (974)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.

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  (717): DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!! (717): Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly. http://tfl.nu/0dyl
  Replies (22) Good night (1602) Bad night (3435)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.

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  (816): He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance. http://tfl.nu/ljav
  Replies (5) Good night (2573) Bad night (1347)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself

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  (309): Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself http://tfl.nu/lvoc
  Replies (6) Good night (544) Bad night (1032)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.

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  (530): Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking. http://tfl.nu/uxvx
  Replies (4) Good night (537) Bad night (1173)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Would you like season tickets to my vagina?

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  (502): Would you like season tickets to my vagina? http://tfl.nu/fkgh
  Replies (12) Good night (1801) Bad night (460)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.

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  (412): By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me. http://tfl.nu/u2xy
  Replies (7) Good night (762) Bad night (423)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him

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  (403): He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him http://tfl.nu/czi8
  Replies (2) Good night (1021) Bad night (177)

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