I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
