i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
