so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
