I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
