Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
