dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
