At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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