Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
