Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
wanna go halves on a baby?
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
