Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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