What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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