gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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