But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
After tacos, we're chasing women.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
