Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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