Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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