At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
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So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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