she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
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