So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
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Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
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I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life