Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
