I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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