Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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