isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
