You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
pop tarts are not kleenex
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize