Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
