My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
