Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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