what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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