you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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