its not stalking. its research.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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