I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
