yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
