Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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