i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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