Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
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