Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Im part way to drunk.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
