Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
