marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
