I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
My bed smells like the plague
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
