Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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