Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
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