The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
