My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Randomize
