If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
my being single is dangerous.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Randomize
