you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize
