There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
