But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
