Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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