i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
A+ Viking dick
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
